Firewood Splitting Simulator

Posted by memalign 7 days ago

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Comments

Comment by CamouflagedKiwi 2 days ago

This is kinda fun, but doesn't match most of my experience splitting firewood.

The wood barely moves after it's split. If you split it perfectly, the two halves will almost certainly both fall to each side (they're pushed outwards by the axe).

You can't just randomly split it across the grain into slices like you're slicing bread.

I guess mostly: it's not tiring, which sort of sucks when you're doing it for real, but it is satisfying. This doesn't scratch that itch for me, but I guess it's fun in a way, similar to that cleaning simulator thing.

Comment by neilv 2 days ago

For players who are new to the game, there should be a 1/4 chance you go to bed proud of an honest day's work with your hands, and wake up the next morning having strained a muscle you didn't even know you had, and you can't chop wood for the next couple weeks.

Comment by channel_t 1 day ago

Yes, and possibly a constellation of little cuts and bruises on your shins.

Comment by XorNot 1 day ago

As someone who recently did some hand splitting of firewood I can directly relate to this.

Comment by helterskelter 2 days ago

There's a surprising amount of technique and knowledge that goes into splitting firewood. It isn't rocket science, but I know a 75 year old who can chop wood faster than any young guy who works out at the gym.

Comment by gknapp 2 days ago

I had to take down two absolutely enormous Douglas Fir trees on my property (> 36" base), and asked them to leave the wood rounds for me. I knew it was going to be a lot of wood, but even then, I was not prepared. I spent about a fair bit of my free time over the next 1-2 months just out there slowly working my way through the pile, and you're absolutely right - you get substantially better at it. For me, it looked something like this:

Stage 1: At first, I could chop essentially nothing, probably 60+ minutes per round as I mostly puzzled about how to make progress and got lucky from time to time with a round that split easily (fortunately, I had a nice splitting axe)

Stage 2: Then I bought some splitting wedges, and I used a handheld sledgehammer to drive them in to what I thought were the weak spots, and then ultimately pried open the log, to pieces that I could split more readily.

Stage 3: I bought a massive demolition sledge hammer (essentially a two-handed battle hammer) and used that to drive the wedges in after getting them started, and made a bit more progress on actually splitting the rounds.

Stage 4: After doing this countless times, you just a knack for reading the wood, and where it will / won't split. I reverted back to using just the splitting axe, since if you hit the wood in the right spots, it really just splits on its own.

Here's where I ended up, if it helps any of you:

- Start by establishing the fracture line that will be used to split the round in half. I would eyeball any existing line on the round towards the center, and use the axe head to mark a line, away from any knots , from the center to the edge. These two center-to-edge didn't necessarily need to be inline. They could be slightly offset, like hands on a clock.

- With moderate force, just repeatedly strike that line, working from the center outwards. You'd be shocked out how quickly repeated strikes widen the line, and eventually the wood's own weight almost causes it to fall apart.

- Recursively do this with the two halves: Draw the line from (what was the center), radially out to the edge. Repeatedly strike until these pieces have been halved.

- Continue this process until you have proper pizza wedges. At this point, it's pretty trivial to just chop the pizza wedge, from the wedge to the base, into 4 or 5 smaller firewood-sized logs.

I know y'all probably didn't care to read this, but this was quite honestly weeks of my life in learning this, and I couldn't find a great guide on YouTube or anything, especially for rounds this big.

Comment by bregma 2 days ago

I don't burn softwood because hardwood is a much better fuel as a primary heat source, especially when you live in a mixed forest. Sugar maple, red oak, birch, and beech. Beech is the best: straight grain, good density, but less common where I live.

The trick to splitting hardwood, other than avoiding burls and knots, is to shave off chords around the outside of the buck. If you tried radial cuts or splitting on the diameter, well, best of luck with getting a season's wood split in one year. Chords around the circumference for about 50% of the buck, thenif you're lucky the core will split on the diameter.

Also, use a maul with fat cheeks and no edge rather than an axe. It's the right tool for the job.

Comment by kelseydh 1 day ago

Advice I would add: use a tire when splitting firewood to hold the logs together. See: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PMv6-SYzv-Q

Wood no longer goes flying. Much easier to chop quickly.

Comment by tyleo 1 day ago

That’s a rad technique. Thanks for sharing.

Comment by butlike 1 day ago

Between yours and the parent comment, I'm just surprised how LONG splitting wood takes. A year for a season's wood feels much longer than I would have imagined.

Comment by LtdJorge 1 day ago

I don’t know. Each year, my dad and I bring the chainsaw before November, fall some dead pines and cut them into logs. We either split them into firewood that evening or the next day. That’s enough for around 3 months of winter (center of Spain, cold, but almost never below 0C and never snows).

We don’t split the, into very small pieces, some logs we don’t even split as they fit into the fireplace in one piece. We don’t look for the highest girth, but for what’s more practical, yearly fires kill enough trees for that.

Comment by bregma 1 day ago

I live in Canada, winter is 6 months and we get a few weeks below -30 and deep snow November through March. It's a different story.

Comment by bregma 1 day ago

My experience is it takes 100 hours to buck, split, haul, and stack the 7 or so cords of wood it takes to heat my house. A cord is 4 feet by 4 feet by 8 feet. The total time includes time it takes to sharpen the saw, and time it takes for trips to the gas station for gas for the saw and the splitter. Time for replacing the handle on the maul or the oil in the splitter is extra.

But that 100 hours is using a hydraulic splitter. Hand-splitting using a maul takes several hours longer. But it keeps you twice as warm: it heats you once when you split it and once when you burn it.

Comment by altairprime 1 day ago

I cared to read this :) Thanks for the effort invested.

Comment by helterskelter 2 days ago

You can also score the ends of the rounds with your saw about an inch deep, laid out radially like you're cutting a pizza, then work your wedges in.

Comment by tclancy 2 days ago

Highly recommend https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC872sqjMNC8kHU0GU0ShZFw while cautioning that she seems to be genetically engineered to split wood. Her technique is like watching an Olympic athlete. No wasted motion at all, all energy delivered to the maul straight down. She’s a muse.

Comment by dotancohen 2 days ago

She's got a video where she explains in detail how to chop. She goes through everything from stance - including protecting the shins - to axe technique. Absolutely terrific - I feel a strained shoulder just watching the videos.

Comment by altairprime 1 day ago

Comment by tomcam 2 days ago

Wow! Great link. I’m better than average but… yeah, I’d upgrade her to goddess. She’ll just carve a new axe handle when she feels like it. Truly humbling.

Comment by klondike_klive 1 day ago

I just knew who this was going to be before I even opened the link. One of the few accounts I miss from having deleted Instagram from my phone!

Comment by smackeyacky 2 days ago

My grandfather was like this, and not with soft wood. We try to burn Australian hardwoods and that takes quite a bit of force to split. He could pound through it like a knife through butter. There’s a definite art to hardwood, looking where the slightest fault might be. You can’t just smash it in the middle, your block splitter (preferred) or axe just bounces off it.

Comment by NuclearPM 2 days ago

Try to burn hardwoods? What does that mean?

Comment by _carbyau_ 2 days ago

As a fellow australian but now former wood chopper: "Try" should be "prefer".

IE when you get a load of firewood for the winter, you want it to be hardwood. The person you buy the wood from may mix in softwood depending on their trustworthiness...

Why prefer hardwood? Hardwood density means it will burn for ages. So you have to mess with the fire less and it'll still have at least hot coals in the morning if you put a log on before bed.

Comment by defrost 2 days ago

Jarrah, one of the hardest of the hard woods burns hot and long and (well ventilated) leaves almost no ash behind.

If you want hot coals in the morning, throw in a log or two of river gum / softer ashy woods before bedtime and the Jarrah coals will not burn out and disappear while the house sleeps but get buried in ash and stay hot but smothered.

Stir and throw in light kindling at dawn and it'll be roaring by the time you get back to the house for breakfast.

Comment by smackeyacky 2 days ago

It’s wood. You put it in your fireplace and set fire to it for heat

Comment by bregma 2 days ago

Ah, sweet summer child.

When the days you have to break the ice on the dog's water bowl in the morning come, you will quickly learn what kinds of wood there are and what you want to burn for heat.

For example, if you choose a lot of paper birch (it splits easily, lights easily, and smells nice while burning) you will quickly get to know all the local firefighters after all your chimney fires.

Comment by Theodores 2 days ago

In former times you had to serve a twelve year apprenticeship before you could be trusted to split wood for barrels, you can do a PhD in rocket science in less time.

Comment by cpncrunch 2 days ago

It's a combination of technique and the type of wood. Even with perfect technique, some wood is simply too hard to split. I've got the bottom 5 or 6 rounds of a bigleaf maple sitting in my yard that I simply can't make a dent in. You're welcome to take it if you can split it :)

Comment by Merad 2 days ago

Are you trying to split it with an axe? You need a sledgehammer and a few splitting wedges. The sledge lets you apply a lot more force than an axe and striking the wedge focuses that force onto a small area. The first wedge will open a crack, then you use additional wedges to expand that crack until she splits.

Source: grew up in a wood burning family, helped split many stubborn hardwood trees (all by hand).

Comment by butlike 1 day ago

The dude in the comments above suggested a maul, which seems nice (kinda like an axe and a sledge built into one tool)

Comment by HeyLaughingBoy 1 day ago

A wedge is still useful with a maul. Sometimes to split a large-diameter log, you'll want to start a split and insert the wedge to open it, then you continue the split with the maul. It's helpful if you have timber that doesn't have a straight grain and doesn't want to split open.

Comment by helterskelter 2 days ago

If it came from the base of the tree the wood grain will probably be squirrelly and practically unsplittable. Get a chainsaw or hydraulic woodsplitter, or throw them in a bonfire. Alternatively, use them in a woodworking project or innoculate them with your favorite mushroom spores.

Comment by bregma 2 days ago

I got some burly maple ends that even my 22-ton hydraulic splitter can't handle. Toss 'em into the woods, let nature take care of 'em.

Comment by grantmuller 2 days ago

These are also good for those "Swedish logs" where you drill a hole in the top and the side, and then cut grooves with a hand saw in the top and make a fire right on top.

Comment by cpncrunch 2 days ago

Well they're about 4ft diameter and not really even possible to move. My electric chainsaw would just burn up trying to cut them, and the cost of a hydraulic woodsplitter wouldn't be cost-effective.

Current plan is just to leave them there until either they start drying/rotting enough to split, or I find someone who wants to take them off my hands.

Comment by jimnotgym 2 days ago

If it didn't require flights, I'd bring my maul and wedges and take on your challenge.

Big rounds are the most fun.

Comment by larodi 2 days ago

It takes understanding rotation and momentum to do right. Also different to bet chops in different ways.

Comment by scottcorgan 2 days ago

this is the most hacker news comment possible

Comment by chamomeal 2 days ago

So many of the top comments look like parodies of HN comments

Comment by warumdarum 2 days ago

I miss the part where the axe gets stuck and you hsve tovturn it over. I found it well made and deeply satisfying

Comment by helterskelter 2 days ago

> I miss the part where the axe gets stuck and you hsve tovturn it over.

Hit it around the edges, like taking a chord from the edge of a circle, and try to use the top half of the bit to do cutting. Good ax technique depends on accuracy, on top of which you can slowly add strength as your accuracy improves. If there's a crack in the end of a round, you should be able to put the bit of the ax directly into it, which will normally split it wide open without much effort. Different species of wood have different characteristics though, so terms and conditions apply.

Comment by JodieBenitez 2 days ago

> If you split it perfectly, the two halves will almost certainly both fall to each side

Just put it in a old small tire :)

Comment by telesilla 2 days ago

As someone who spent a teenagehood doing the same, I agree it was far too (un)satisfying to be able to cut the pieces and not having them fall to the side. But if you have an excellent axe and true flat surface you could get pretty close to the game. But for better reality it needs more indication of splinters and blisters after a few runs. I suggest adding a cast iron wedge splitter as a next level option.

Comment by jonstewart 2 days ago

There should be a "hickory" option where the axe just bounces back at you or gets stuck in the round.

Comment by rurp 1 day ago

As a very novice wood splitter the thing that most jumped out to me was the wood splitting in one swing every time. That's one or two orders of magnitude off from my experience.

Comment by shash7 2 days ago

Use a nice large maul. Will go through most wood like a butter knife.

I stupidly used a axe for a long time.

Comment by xlii 2 days ago

TIL about existence of (non-game like) mauls and that they might be used for splitting firewood.

Comment by kjkjadksj 1 day ago

Wait till you see the hydraulic mauls.

Comment by razorbeamz 2 days ago

That's because the AI that generated this doesn't know what splitting wood is like.

Comment by tclancy 2 days ago

I dunno, what are you splitting? For full rounds or the large chunks that first split off them, I often do have stuff go flying when it finally splits. Typically I am splitting on top of another round so that adds to the distance.

Comment by Reason077 2 days ago

Was just doing this literally the other day! But with a hydraulic log splitter which made it pretty easy and fun. The hardest part was lifting and stacking all the logs!

Comment by apercu 2 days ago

I only like splitting perfectly seasoned wood ( I do about a face cord every summer/fall). Otherwise it’s just too much work. Got any tips in to tooling? I use a maul.

Comment by rebuilder 2 days ago

In my experience, fresh wood splits much easier. I prefer a big splitting axe. But mostly the wood I use isn’t terribly gnarled or wide.

Comment by tclancy 2 days ago

I have a couple diamond/ grenade wedges, a rescue wedge and a traditional wedge I barely ever use. I have the big Fiskars maul and that is great for a lot of stuff. Bigger things, whole rounds I use two wedges near each other and hit them in concert with the sledge side of the maul.

Most wood is easier to split when dry/ aged, but I recently learned that does not apply to elm and a few others, so it’s worth checking. Elm is awful no matter what.

Comment by greenbit 2 days ago

Elm is awful even at burning. Cold, smoky stuff.

Comment by nutjob2 2 days ago

> This is kinda fun, but doesn't match most of my experience splitting firewood.

Neither mine, I have a machine that does it for me. Much safer and efficient.

Comment by kmoser 2 days ago

I find it much easier to use AI to vibesplit my firewood. Sure, it costs me lots of money to buy axe tokens, and sometimes all I end up with is a useless pile of splinters or sawdust, but it's the way of the future; just imagine how efficient it'll be when the tech has matured?

Comment by thenewwazoo 2 days ago

You're right, and I'm sorry. You specifically instructed me to split the logs in the side yard, and I split the cat. I recognize now that this was a strategic error, and cutting the cat into chunks does not accomplish the goals.

    edit

    AGENTS.md
    + Only chop things made of wood. Meat does not split well. NEVER cut up the cat.
I've updated the AGENTS.md file to track this mistake in the future. Should I continue chopping the rest of the firewood?

Comment by cyberax 2 days ago

Never set the cat on fire, it surely will annoy it.

Comment by Chaosvex 2 days ago

The new model is so good at splitting firewood that it's too dangerous to release to the public without safeguards to stop it from splitting things that aren't actually firewood. The old models are terrible - I can't believe we ever thought they were good.

Remember: this is the worst that splitting firewood will ever be.

Comment by notrealyme123 2 days ago

It might split atom's

Comment by mindok 2 days ago

If only you could pipe the waste heat from the data centre…

Comment by AngryData 2 days ago

Not if you also want to get excellent exercise. It would take me no time at all to build a splitter for my tractor if I wanted one, but I plan on chopping by hand until I can't because otherwise I will either be significantly less fit or have to take out additional non-productive time to workout.

Comment by mindslight 1 day ago

I'm right there with you. I've manually split wood with wedges when I was a kid. It was tedious. Now I just use the wedges for felling the trees. I get enough exercise from the stacking.

I've always felt the attraction to manual splitting was some idyllic vision of country life, backed up by the movie trope where characters are having "alone time" but still "being strong". I'd be interested to hear if anyone in this thread burns a significant amount of wood (say 4 cords), and actually splits it all by hand.

Comment by Fokamul 2 days ago

Comment by fsckboy 1 day ago

>doesn't match most of my experience splitting firewood

can't wait to hear your comments after playing pacman: whoosh

Comment by CyLith 2 days ago

You missed the best part: analyzing what to do around knots. There's a skill and artistry to it. Those who are good at it make it look absolutely effortless: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCsIFvStf9Oz99GMitW4vD_g

Comment by gaudystead 2 days ago

For anyone reading the above comment and wanting to see what the commenter might be referring to, here is the first YT video I found on that channel that is relatively brief but has an example of the techniques involved:

https://youtube.com/watch?v=G_QZIGVYX_4

Comment by AngryData 2 days ago

And as someone who has split my own firewood by hand for heating for the last 30 years, he definitely knows how to throw around an axe, almost too well because he makes it look easier than it is. But even when everything splits clean, him throwing an axe around for 30+ minutes straight and not being out of breath and able to still talk shows both immense fitness and experience.

Comment by shmiga 2 days ago

Just fucking relax and enjoy!

Comment by jkskkm 2 days ago

[flagged]

Comment by bicx 2 days ago

People here seem a little confused. This is a simulator in the same way Goat Simulator is a simulator. It’s from a collection called “screen toys” and it’s meant to be mindless fun.

Comment by binoct 2 days ago

Here here. This was a joy to wake up to and wish I hadn’t stumbled into the comments.

Comment by Timwi 2 days ago

For future reference, the phrase is “hear, hear”.

Comment by thih9 2 days ago

There, there. ;)

Comment by jfengel 1 day ago

Yeah, yeah.

Comment by sowbug 2 days ago

Then you're really going to love this.

The proper term is a shortened form of "hear him, hear him," which was necessary because British Parliament didn't allow clapping or cheering. Instead, if you wanted to show agreement with a speaker's point, you'd shout out that everyone else should "hear" him.

Not to be confused with "hear ye," which evolved from the French "oyez," which is the imperative form of "to listen," which was shouted at a crowd before an important announcement.

Comment by binoct 2 days ago

Thanks, that was interesting to learn, I’d never thought about how odd the phrase sounds as-is.

There’s a fascinating complexity to what constitutes constructive feedback, criticism, or dismissal. And to when it’s okay to provide one, the other, or none at all.

Comment by numlock86 2 days ago

France is bacon.

Comment by pranavm27 2 days ago

And this is HN, its acting as its meant to xD

Comment by frollogaston 1 day ago

All those virtual desk toys in the Mac OS X Tiger Dashboard. You had to be there.

Comment by aaron695 2 days ago

[dead]

Comment by wartywhoa23 2 days ago

This is HN I'd like to see more of.

Mocking too nerdy gripes on "simulator" accuracy, sharing some real world experience with physical things beyond the screen frames, and on in the same vein.

A breath of fresh air, really, in the prevailing AI smog.

Comment by tylerrobinson 2 days ago

FWIW, the creator’s Insta post for this thing says #vibecoding

@shapiro500

No shade if so, I think it’s an awesome little toy.

Comment by underdeserver 2 days ago

I don't think I could have vibe coded that.

At the very least, he photographed and built models of logs and his own yard.

Comment by jenniferhooley 2 days ago

I do a lot of game stuff (professionally and just for fun) and play around with maxing out vibeing little feature samples.

This would be fairly straightforward vibecode over a day or two.

Definitely not to throw shade at the guy. But yea, there is nothing here that wouldn't be easily vibeable.

Comment by gaudystead 2 days ago

Minimum Vibeable Product

Comment by underdeserver 2 days ago

My point is that it's easily vibeable for you, because you do game stuff.

I don't - I did large scale web, embedded, data, and security, but no graphics or games. I wouldn't know where to begin.

Comment by jenniferhooley 19 hours ago

Yes, but the AI will handle asking you everything. Here's how easy it is to make a game that functions like his but without the polish - put Claude in plan mode 1 prompt, then answer any questions it has:

--- Make me a threejs game in html. The "game" is where you can tap a button to add a log to a cutting block. You have an axelike (e.g., a stem cube for handle and slim cube for axe blade) object that you can axe into the wood, and wherever the head intersects the underlying "log" cylinder it splits the log.

So blade is a hittest object, where that object hits the spawned log, the log splits, use a decent physics lib (ammoJS is fine) so it feels good. Do you have any questions? ---

After answering about 5 basic questions, the above made a cute little physics based log cutting game very similar to this guy's demo - now it'd probably take about 5-8 more hours to slowly prompt out a more polished version. This stuff is really easy - you don't have to have any experience in game dev to prompt it up.

Comment by mrguyorama 1 day ago

Remaking this exact game on your engine of choice would actually be a great starter project. It's extremely small and self contained, very little actual interaction, simple models and whatever textures you can make or steal.

Comment by lukan 2 days ago

"in the prevailing AI smog"

How do you know AI was not used in the making of this?

(personally I don't care, the result seems nice to me)

Comment by wartywhoa23 2 days ago

This I don't know, but at least the topic is not related!

Comment by jeron 2 days ago

only a small subset of the HN front page is AI related lol

Comment by encom 2 days ago

What bizarro world HN are you reading? I'd like the link, please.

Comment by wiml 2 days ago

Looking at the front page right now, only about 8 out of 30 are about AI.

Comment by jfengel 1 day ago

Only?

Comment by MatthiasWandel 2 days ago

Looks like its coded by someone who has never split firewood. The challenge is not deciding where to split, its executing the split. Like hitting the same gap if it doesn't split, deciding orientation to aoid knots, figuring out how to put it on end if it wasn't cut straight.

And some of the cuts it allowed me would hit the ax handle on another part, the shock from that damages the ax handle and is painful on the hands.

And then there's the lifting the stuck block by the axe and hitting it axe side down to finish the split instead of pulling the stuck axe out.

So the simulation handles none of the challenges of splitting wood.

Comment by bsiverly 2 days ago

I swear this forum needs to embrace their inner child more some days. My four year old loved this.

Well executed fun.

Comment by derbOac 2 days ago

I love it also, but I think the comments are pointing to an unmet need for firewood splitting simulators.

The comments are suggesting that someone could go to town adding different kinds of hatchets, mauls, axes, woods, and different swings, and people would eat it up.

Comment by goosejuice 2 days ago

Both can be true. It's cool and fun but simulation is a well defined term.

Comment by micromacrofoot 2 days ago

to be fair this wasn't being shared to a site filled with four year olds

Comment by stavros 2 days ago

My inner four year old loved this.

Comment by Jgrubb 2 days ago

Yes, but obviously this toy faces a challenge when folks who take this stuff seriously walk by. I immediately want a bungee to put around it so the wood doesn't go everywhere. I also want to split it finer than in quarters. Had to nope out.

Comment by furyofantares 2 days ago

I think it might be more that folks who take this stuff seriously face a challenge when someone makes a toy about it.

I believe the toy is indifferent to your inability to enjoy it.

Comment by bsiverly 2 days ago

Seems like you know what you want to go build. Can’t wait to see your version on HN soon :)

Comment by Jgrubb 2 days ago

I have too much actual wood to split but I like where you're head is at.

Comment by PufPufPuf 2 days ago

The "beer drinking simulator" we all had on our phones in 2010 wasn't a very accurate representation of drinking beer either

Comment by nik282000 2 days ago

I am shocked that tapping a touchscreen is nothing like splitting wood with an axe.

Comment by adamredwoods 2 days ago

I'm exhausted by all this tapping! Who knew cutting firewood was such hard work!

/s

Comment by mikestew 2 days ago

Man, don’t ever play Goat Simulator, then. You’ll be all day typing a wall of text about that.

Comment by greenbit 2 days ago

Well, what about when you get into a piece of apple wood, and as soon as you hit it, carpenter ants boil out of it, all over your chopping block, up the handle of your axe, and you don't even realize 3 or 4 of them got up your pant-legs until suddenly your shins feel like they've been hit with white phosphorous rounds?

That would be pretty hard to simulate. Guess they had to stop somewhere

Comment by Daub 2 days ago

Experienced wood splitter here. All your points are valid. I had to ruin one perfectly good axe handle before I learned how to swing. However, the sim is still a lot of fun.

Comment by embedding-shape 2 days ago

> I had to ruin one perfectly good axe handle before I learned how to swing.

Is it really that difficult? Maybe my memory is vague, but chopping wood in autumn/fall for the winter just took a bunch of time, and wasn't very fun, but wasn't that bad, especially compared to other things like harvesting veggies stuff where you have to be on the ground. I'm not sure how you'd manage to ruin a axe handle before understanding how to do it well-enough, takes a couple of swings at max.

Comment by AngryData 2 days ago

I think it very much depends on the wood too, the species and how seasoned it is and how dry it is. Some chunks you can hit it almost anywhere and it will cleave across the entire block, but other woods you will hit a half inch in from the edge of the bark and the board will split under the blade and let it through, but leave a half inch near the edge unsplit that the axe handle hits with full force. Do it enough times and the front edge of the handle can get messed up.

Sometimes you will see wire or something else wrapped up near the top of the handle for that reason to help protect it a bit. But if you get enough practice you can reliably hit with the bottom half or quarter of the axe sticking out of the log so that can't happen.

Comment by JackFr 2 days ago

I spent a summer chopping a whole bunch of wood with a steel handled 10 lb maul. Many was the evening where my hand was numb until the morning, but by the end of the summer my shoulders were ripped.

You quickly learn the differences between locust, pine, maple, oak or, god forbid, cherry.

Comment by AngryData 2 days ago

I see a lot of people that split infrequently use mauls. But personally I think an axe works better once you get a bit of practice. The trick with the axe a lot of people miss at first is to focus on the swing speed, and not as much as delivering force and mass behind the blow. Some species the maul can work better, but 90% of the time I feel like an axe is just a bit less effort and a bit quicker.

Comment by Enginerrrd 2 days ago

Splitting Eucalyptus and big madrone by hand will test a man.

Comment by coderenegade 2 days ago

I have a few black wattle rounds that have been sitting around for years. I have a go at them whenever I feel like I need to be humbled. There's also a fallen tree at the bottom of our property that blunts chainsaws. It's been there for years and nothing seems to eat it. I harvest what I can from it, and a good sized chunk will burn through the night.

Comment by greenbit 2 days ago

Could add beech, yellow birch, black locust to that god-forbid list

Comment by MatthiasWandel 2 days ago

I once took a sledgehammer to work so everyone could take a turn taking a whack at some old prototypes outside. I came to the sad realization that even hitting a particular spot with a sledgehammer is not an inate skill. If you've never done it, you miss!

Comment by lbreakjai 2 days ago

I've seen people miss the tractor wheel with a hammer at my gym. I didn't even know if was physically possible.

Comment by Daub 2 days ago

My experience was a year spent working as a forester. One of our duties was to keep the wood burning stoves supplied. I remember learning that ash got its name from the fact that it burned so well, and willow left perfect charcoal.

As for the axe handle… I was told off by my boss for mashing up the handle by my constant missing. Even now, I am the same with hammers and nails - not nearly as sure with my aim as I should be. On the plus side That was also the time I learned how to replace an axe handle. also the time that

Comment by oniony 2 days ago

The suspense is killing me.

Comment by Daub 1 day ago

Whoops. Sorry. That last sentence should have been deleted.

Comment by roarcher 2 days ago

Same. I've only done it a couple times but it takes minutes to learn and you just get into a rhythm and keep going. It's like peeling potatoes.

I wonder if there's a name for the psychological phenomenon of people doing some trivial blue-collar-ish task and then dramatizing it to make themselves sound like a grizzled old hand.

Comment by notduncansmith 2 days ago

Have heard this called blue-washing (eg Mike Rowe) when done publicly

Comment by david422 2 days ago

Depends on the wood. Perfectly dry, seasoned hardwood is going to be easy. Wood with knots, soft wood etc. is going to take a while to figure out.

Comment by mikestew 2 days ago

Is it really that difficult?

It’s not, 12 year olds can do it. Ruining an axe handle is not a requirement. I’m not saying humans are born knowing how to swing an axe, but c’mon.

Comment by MatthiasWandel 2 days ago

A 12 year old can indeed acquire that skill, but that doesn't mean any adult can do it.

Comment by roarcher 2 days ago

Some adults indeed can't do it, but that doesn't mean it's difficult.

And it is certainly not "wear out a whole axe handle just to learn to swing" difficult.

Comment by mauvehaus 2 days ago

You don't wear it out. You land the head long of your aim point, and splinter the handle on whatever you were trying to hit. It's certainly not hard to ruin a handle if you're learning to swing a sledge by driving steel splitting wedges.

Comment by jonners00 2 days ago

There's a huge difference between say, weilding a hatchet on a camping trip, and trying to get the hang of a splitting axe, with a 3ft or longer handle, when you're a kid. Getting a long, sweeping arc that comes down in the right spot isn't easy and if the axe head's centrifugal force pulls it away from you, you clunk the handle down on the wood. I definitely recall my hands ringing and numb from those kinds of impact. I don't remember ruining a handle, but if it had been my chore, I think I could've come close.

Comment by roarcher 1 day ago

> There's a huge difference between say, weilding a hatchet on a camping trip, and trying to get the hang of a splitting axe, with a 3ft or longer handle, when you're a kid.

So not difficult for an adult, like I said.

Comment by aqrit 2 days ago

>Is it really that difficult?

Fiberglass handles are now standard on splitting mauls (for this reason). Rotten hearts, or driving wedges. It is easy to miss a swing by an inch or two when fatigued.

Edit: I also broke my first axe handle. The sibling comments here are wild.

Comment by lstodd 2 days ago

Yeah, tell me about fiberglass. It slips out too. And that was Fiskars, not some noname crap.

When it does, you put it back and hammer some big screws and nails into it, this way it holds some more time.

Comment by JKCalhoun 2 days ago

"So the simulation handles none of the challenges of splitting wood."

Ha ha, that's why we like it.

Comment by raincole 2 days ago

FYI Tree Simulator is coded by someone who has never been a tree too.

Comment by bot403 2 days ago

Oh you guys are all gonna hate Sim Ant.

Comment by the_af 2 days ago

I had a lot of fun with Sim Ant... but mostly playing as the spider :D

(I'm talking about the classic, not sure if there's a remake).

Comment by idiotsecant 2 days ago

I don't know if you know this or not, but this is a game.

Comment by sgarrity 2 days ago

I might print out this quote and put it on my wall! :-)

"Looks like its coded by someone who has never split firewood. "

Comment by InsideOutSanta 2 days ago

I can't tell if this is a parody of HN comments or a serious response to a little toy app.

Comment by andix 2 days ago

It's obviously not an accurate simulation. I'm sure the creator knows it isn't. Probably the best they could come up with in limited time.

Comment by alamortsubite 2 days ago

It's perfect because the kind of people who will enjoy it shouldn't be allowed near an axe, anyway.

As someone with a wood stove, for my first few chops I rotated the log to orient the checking. Then it dawned on me that the simulation likely wasn't that sophisticated, and I came here to meet up with you guys.

Comment by hasgarion2600 2 days ago

And the domain expert has build how many playable wood splitting games?

Comment by sklargh 2 days ago

If this triggers your interest in IRL firewood splitting it’s a very meditative and satisfying yard job. Also great mild to moderate workout between the splitting and stacking, especially on a crisp Fall afternoon.

Comment by delichon 2 days ago

I have a lot of splitting to do right now, and you're welcome to it. I'll only charge a low nominal fee. But let me know before September, because that's when I usually go rent a hydraulic splitter from the local hardware store. Then I spend a very long day splitting so that I can return it the next day.

I've spent a lot of time splitting with a big maul, but for me it's harder that it looks. I've broken two mauls by striking to far. And even with "soft" wood, I have stacks of green rounds that I couldn't split at all, the maul just bounces off. But I'm glad that you enjoy the process, I'd probably enjoy watching you work.

Comment by bee_rider 2 days ago

If the hydraulic splitter could be electric, so it would not be so loud, I could see that task being meditative. Preferably if the rounds could on a raised platform, so they could just be rolled onto the thing.

Next request, the wood could stack itself somehow.

Comment by mauvehaus 2 days ago

Vertical splitters are better since the splitter comes down to ground level where your rounds already are. Much less lifting.

I'm not super quick with a maul, but I can pretty easily keep up with the hydraulic splitter I've used. The hydraulic splitter is nice for the ones that have really gnarly, interlocked grain.

Comment by bluGill 2 days ago

Until you get a log so tough, it just stalls up when you draw a splitter. Happened more than once. Usually the log is stuck so far in the wedge you can't get it off either.

Comment by mauvehaus 1 day ago

Yikes. That sounds like the kind of lesson one tries to learn secondhand, or at most once. Like the time I stalled out a tow-behind wood chipper (the kind tree services use).

It was a smaller one, and the process for getting the log out involved taking the jack off the trailer tongue and hooking it up to the feed roller springs assembly to spread the rollers far enough to pull the log out.

Comment by bluGill 1 day ago

When I was a kid Dutch Elm disease was killing all the elm trees around me so that is what everyone was heating with. An elm log that is just large enough you need to split it can stall out a wood splitter (not every time, but you will get several in a day of splitting). When splitting by hand it is common to have the handle of the maul sticking out of the log and you can't see it from the top where it went in, you just keep beating it hoping it eventually goes.

Then we got a large oak tree once, logs you couldn't even life split clean when you barely did more than blow on them.

Comment by adm4 2 days ago

as camping is to "glamping," splitting wood is to "sprinkle wood?"

Comment by 1dontnkow_ 2 days ago

This reminded me when we I was a kid we had to split the wood for the whole winter and that was actually a huge job all day or few days and way harder than just a moderate workout.

I hated it then but actually now I miss the time I spend with my father and brother.

Comment by Loughla 2 days ago

I hated cutting wood, stacking wood, splitting wood, all of it. We ran a potbelly stove in the living room when I was a kid for heat. I hated the stove too.

The only thing I don't miss is rolling a piece of piss elm over to my city living "tough" cousins after two or three pieces of oak and watching the maul just bounce off. Always funny.

Comment by AngryData 2 days ago

I absolutely hated it as a kid, but once I got into my late 20s I started loving it. A great workout and you can go at your own pace as long as you don't wait until the last minute to get it done.

Comment by crimsonnoodle58 2 days ago

Good workout and satisfying, I totally agree. I actually really enjoy it.

But the long term effects on your joints, even if you think you have perfect technique, its better to just get a wood splitter. We can do a whole winters wood in less than a day now, with minimal effort.

Comment by MatthiasWandel 2 days ago

Gotta agree with you there, log splitters rule. We got a little 4 ton electric one for my mom, and on some pieces it would stall. I thought, what a wimpy thing, but then hitting those pieces it wouldn't split with an axe, I realized, those were really hard to split pieces. Just growing up in the 80s we didn't have one cause my dad didn't believe in them.

Comment by PyWoody 2 days ago

If you're chopping wood in the Fall, I sure hope it's for next year's winter.

Comment by codemonkey-zeta 2 days ago

Nope, splitting green wood is much more difficult than splitting dried logs, so I often cut a tree in the spring, stack the rounds, then split those rounds in the fall.

People overestimate how dry wood needs to be to burn correctly. Just have some ultra-dry kindling (seasoned for 2+ years) and you won't have any problems.

On the contrary, I know some folks who let all their wood dry too far, and it burned way too hot and ruined their stove (and almost burned their house down).

Comment by cluckindan 2 days ago

It’s an equation. If you have dry firewood, you need less of it at once. Some folks don’t understand that.

More water in the wood means less efficient combustion, more smoke and harsher smoke, which may irritate your neighbors downwind, or everyone around on still days.

Comment by dylan604 2 days ago

Something every pit master learns along the way. People can tell you, you can read about it, but until you actually try using wood of different dryness, they are just words.

Comment by greenbit 2 days ago

Not to mention a cooler stack temperature and the increased creosote condensation that brings.

Or that it's just pain heavier to lug into the house.

Comment by 2 days ago

Comment by PyWoody 2 days ago

Yikes. I hope you got your chimney swept annually.

Seasoned firewood will burn cleaner, longer, and more efficiently.

Comment by 2 days ago

Comment by nickstinemates 2 days ago

Taking a few minutes out of the day to to split some logs to hear your house for your family feels incredibly rewarding and satisfying.

Comment by Jgrubb 2 days ago

[dead]

Comment by astura 2 days ago

Don't listen to this noise; it fucking sucks, it's kinda dangerous, and it's not at all meditative. It's the exact opposite of meditative. My parents made me do it because they certainly didn't want to, because it sucks. I'm so glad I don't have to split firewood ever again.

If you're looking for a meditative exercise try yoga.

Comment by bee_rider 2 days ago

It’s also astonishing how much wood needs to be split, to heat even a moderately sized house. Depends on the climate though, I guess.

Comment by dredmorbius 2 days ago

And the fireplace / stove.

Most open-hearth fireplaces are tremendously inefficient, not only sending most of the heat up the chimney, but drawing in additional cold air in doing so.

A masonry stove with an external air draw should be far more efficient, and burn much more cleanly to boot. The pollution factor from woodstoves is another major consideration, and means wood-burning is limited in many areas.

Comment by dylan604 2 days ago

My dad and his father built the house my family grew up in. The fireplace had two vents on either side of the fire box that drew air from the floor and vented near the ceiling. The ceiling fans in the room would circulate the air in the room. It was the only place I've spent time that a fireplace actually was useful.

Comment by bluGill 2 days ago

When those work well they're fine but be very careful. It's not uncommon of for smoke to go out what you think is the in intake and often those aren't correctly built as a chimney and so you can burn your house down.

Comment by dylan604 2 days ago

Knowing how ours were built, I don't even know what you describe could happen. The intake vents are on the floor with a standard height raised hearth (12"???) while the exit vents are about 6' off the floor. Not really sure how smoke is any where near the intake. The smoke is contained within the chimney. I'm at a loss at how to design something so poorly that the smoke is near any vents. Then again, I've grown up around construction, so maybe that knowledge is preventing me from thinking dumb???

Comment by bluGill 1 day ago

Maybe I misunderstand your description. I'm referring to the fresh air inlet for the fire, not additional HVAC pipes. It is common for attempts to put a fresh air inlet in a fireplace to instead have smoke go out that fresh air inlet.

Comment by dredmorbius 1 day ago

My understanding is that the venting dylan604 is describing relate to airflow around the firebox / chimney, rather than in or out of the firebox.

An incorrectly-placed firebox intake, or even a poorly-drafting open-hearth fireplace, can indeed dump smoke (and carbon monoxide) into the living / heated space.

Comment by klibertp 2 days ago

Well, it's the kind of "meditative" you get when training martial arts forms. It gets good after a few years of preparation; before that, it's not as fun as spars and way less useful than general conditioning.

Coming from a kendo background, when I had to chop firewood for a few years while living in the countryside, I generally focused on accuracy. The swing is completely different than with a sword, and getting the chop to land at the exact spot (I drew lines with a marker) tens of times in a row was very satisfying, but required a lot of conscious effort to get there. It's not trivial to land a chop at the exact spot you want, and it's also quite hard to ensure the axe travels at its fastest exactly at the moment of impact.

It can be fun, but you need to be into things like that in the first place; plus, having to do it no matter the weather and all the other things you need to do can kill all the joy instantly.

Comment by AaronAPU 2 days ago

You sound like my father when someone mentions green beans

Comment by troyvit 2 days ago

There was this old Piers Anthony short story about a little kid who likes playing with his dad's wood-splitting kit. He's a little kid so he doesn't handle an axe, but he does use adzes, hatchets, I dunno stuff I don't remember now[1]. Anyway he gets kidnapped by aliens and gets to join a great intergalactic wood-splitting competition. I won't ruin it but maybe if you get really good at this simulation you could be next.

[1] https://www.isfdb.org/cgi-bin/title.cgi?46184

Comment by conception 2 days ago

Haha this is also the plot of The Last Starfighter but with video games. I wonder if the screenwriter was familiar with it.

Comment by jcims 2 days ago

Damn I loved that movie!

Comment by hagbard_c 2 days ago

Nice sim, there's one thing missing though: splitting two sections at the same time. It do this all the time as it can almost double splitting speed when dealing with mid-size logs. Split the log in two halves, making sure to keep the halves close together. Rotate around the splitting block by about 60°, split again hitting both halves at the same time. Do this once more and you've split the log into 6 60° sections, a good size for stacking in the fireplace and also a good section size to be able to light a fire. I split between 5 m³ and 7 m³ of firewood per year which is enough to heat our house and cook our food, have been doing this for about 20 years now so I have some experience. The double-split is a good time saver.

Comment by wartywhoa23 2 days ago

I'd upvote you twice for your nickname alone, if I could! All hail Eris! :)

Comment by yardshop 2 days ago

The pieces look like they retain the shapes I cut them in when stacked. I started cutting them as pie slices, but then tried a few as parallel chops, and they get stacked in those shapes.

Also interesting is the shadows of leaves that stay consistent on the scene as the pile grows, but they don't appear on the splitting area itself.

Lots of engine noise too, I guess that's the ambience in this person's back yard! Probably true for lots of us.

Comment by greenbit 2 days ago

After the first cord or two, the ground around the block should be covered in chips and splinters. That might be easy to add to the sim. Otoh, it's a fun little sim as is.

Comment by comrade1234 2 days ago

Half the battle is having the right stance so that you don't accidentally embed the axe in your shin.

Comment by oh_my_goodness 2 days ago

I'm ok that they left that part out.

Comment by coderenegade 2 days ago

I'm honestly having a hard time visualizing the technique some of you guys seem to be using.

Comment by sva_ 2 days ago

Here's a script to automatically chop wood, if you're so inclined:

    setInterval(_=>{a+=.13;['down','up'].map(e=>$('canvas').dispatchEvent(new PointerEvent('pointer'+e,{clientX:innerWidth*(.2+a%.6),clientY:innerHeight*(.4+a%.2)})))},a=9)

Comment by eh8 2 days ago

"Given the opportunity, players will optimize the fun out of a game."

Comment by nZac 2 days ago

This simulates a person far more skilled than me.

I never had to adjust the chunk to get it to sit right, the maul hit exactly where I told it to, and it even stacked itself!

Comment by bluGill 2 days ago

Never had the maul get stuck in the wood. Never had the wood fly off the splitting stump.

Comment by oh_my_goodness 2 days ago

It does fly off sometimes in the game.

Comment by bluGill 2 days ago

I didn't see that but I only did a couple before deciding this reminds me too much of work.

Comment by mac3n 2 days ago

Nothing beats coming home from work, chopping something into pieces, and setting it on fire.

Comment by niraj-agarwal 2 days ago

Got the chop wood, now need the draw water and then we will be good

Comment by m12k 2 days ago

In case anyone is wondering, the quote "Before enlightenment, chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment, chop wood, carry water" is an ancient Zen Buddhist proverb. It speaks to how the life you live, and actions you perform, before and after enlightenment are not materially different. But how and why you do and experience them changes, becoming more mindful and less mired in “attachment” and overthinking.

Comment by cinntaile 2 days ago

It bothers me that I can split a log in 3 parallel pieces, rotate 90 degrees and then magically can split the middle piece. That's physically difficult! Besides that it was fun.

Comment by Tommix11 2 days ago

It seems they chose the Fiskars Axe, good choice I own five of them.

Comment by joelverhagen 1 day ago

Yeah, I recognized that too. Probably the popular X27 :)

Comment by Animats 2 days ago

I kept at it until firewood filled 3/4 of the surrounding circle. After that, new firewood just seemed to disappear.

You can't win.

Comment by Aboutplants 2 days ago

You need a path out

Comment by Icons8 2 days ago

That was a satisfying part of my day. Thank you.

Comment by mrighele 2 days ago

What this miss is a second part where you put the same wood that you split in a fireplace and watch it burn.

Comment by crtified 2 days ago

This task has what I'd call asymmetrical reciprocity.

That is, it's probably easier for the development professional to code a pretend version of chopping wood, than it is for the professional axeman to chop out a pretend version of a computer.

However I do eagerly await being proven wrong.

Comment by dehugger 1 day ago

I have completed 4 rows of firewood, onto my 5th! The stacking animation is very satisfying, I am sad I can't actually see the wood stacking anymore (because my wood pile has grown to large). It would be nice if it persisted across refreshes, and maybe provided a counter for how many rounds/cords of would you have split.

Comment by ab_goat 2 days ago

What about when you’re splitting a log with a branch and the maul bounces straight back up? Lol

Comment by ab_goat 2 days ago

Beautiful sim. Looks like red oak. As someone who has split a lot of wood, wish it could incorporate more of the struggles of splitting logs.

- missing your spot by 6” or more and creating a tiny shard that goes flying - the log you’re aiming at falling as you are in your backswing - getting your maul stuck halfway down the split

Comment by andwur 2 days ago

Could do with a difficulty setting that includes when you inherit someone else's log pile, someone who really enjoyed making every cut on a new and more inventive angle than the last.

Normally a wedge is used to split the wood, but it also doubles as a wedge to be wedged underneath just so you can get the log to stand up.

Also, Y sections (ycombinator mode?). 40 hits later and you might have a nice pile of woodchips, very rarely will it actually split in any clean way.

Comment by neogodless 2 days ago

Yeah this needs pieces with knots, and having to swing at least 3 times before the initial split works. Very unrealistic, 3/10. Need some wedge + sledgehammer modes.

Also how do I simulate my shoulder and lower back hurting?

Comment by bee_rider 2 days ago

With your additions, it probably could be a really neat mini game to have in a survival-crafting game... Game, so, it doesn’t have to be perfect.

But the axe could wobble a bit, depending on some combination of chopping skill and how tired your guy is (simulating shoulder pain and lower back pain). Number of hits required depends on character strength and how straight on the hits are.

I’m not sure how the game would track the pieces of various sizes, though. I guess this would just be for firewood (building wood might have to be handled separately) so maybe it would be fine to just calculate the volume of each slice and have it provide fuel based on that…

Comment by bot403 2 days ago

I think if you sit and play it for 10 hours your lower back will hurt too. It just takes longer.

Comment by jojobas 2 days ago

You'll like Spintires.

Comment by KronisLV 2 days ago

And MudRunner and SnowRunner as well! Great games (in a sometimes frustrating way).

Comment by ptman 2 days ago

Comment by jakedata 2 days ago

The most satisfying part of splitting wood is doing it in temperatures well below freezing. The wood is crystalline in hardness and really does tend to split as it does in this over-optimistic simulation. "Split your own wood and it will warm you twice".

CSB: I had no idea my uncle was unaffected by poison ivy. He invited me over to harvest some dead ash trees on his property. I was destroyed for a month by rashes and he didn't even know the wood was covered in urushiol.

Comment by wraptile 2 days ago

I once lived in a giant country side house in Estonia and nothing matched wood splitting when it comes a morning exercise. You start a bit drowsy and cold but after a few splits you warm up, your mind starts to wake up and body becomes engaged to take on the day. It's a very good exercise that I miss dearly so this simulator is a lovely reminder!

Comment by the_af 2 days ago

Small nitpick (not of the neckbeard type): if you split the wood in slices then rotate it so the cut strikes perpendicular to the slices, it tends to split horizontal pieces of wood without touching the rest, even if it's "sandwiched" between the other slices, which seems odd since it makes the axe edge feel like a surgical strike rather than something with length.

I think it would feel better if it modeled the length of the edge, which should disturb the other horizontal slices.

Comment by rvnx 2 days ago

The page was developed by Claude, maybe you can share the prompt(s) so we can develop variants of it ? I was surprised to see it handles 3D like that so well

Comment by epiccoleman 1 day ago

I enjoy trying to get the maximal number of pieces from the log. My record is 16. The game is slightly annoying about forcing a rotate when i'm trying to shave thinner sections out of the log, so it's somewhat constrained.

Can anyone beat 16?

Comment by rergaqevrae 1 day ago

I got to 19. I found you can split some slices into 3 pieces before they hit the floor and so if you get a thicker log, you can get 6 to 7 cross sections, letting you get past 16

Comment by anon1094 2 days ago

It's all very satisfying: the animations, the chopping, the graphics, and the sounds. I spent more time than I should have chopping splitting firewood.

Comment by mdnahas 1 day ago

I have warm memories of splitting wood at my uncle’s with a sledge hammer and wedge. It is that right mix of physical activity (but not too much) and a little brain work. Great to do early while my aunt is making breakfast.

Advice: WEAR STEEL-TIPPED BOOTS! It saved my toes.

Comment by dwd 2 days ago

Used to watch the competitive wood chopping at my local agricultural show all the time.

The highlight was always the tree felling competition. Each competitor has an axe and four springer boards, and it's a race to basically chop the top off a standing telegraph pole.

That would make a better game.

Comment by gverrilla 2 days ago

It's a toy, not a game.

Comment by 2 days ago

Comment by Choco31415 2 days ago

I chopped so much wood that the browser was starting to lag. Thanks for sharing the simulator, it was fun!

Comment by tonymet 2 days ago

Add beers and drunkenness , and a scene where you miss the log and bury the maul into your leg.

Comment by ElSchorschoDE 2 days ago

[dead]

Comment by BrenBarn 2 days ago

This is oddly satisfying. Only weird part is it seems to split whichever piece I click, even if it's behind another piece or in between two other pieces, where it would be difficult or impossible to hit just that one piece and not the others around it.

Comment by 1e1a 2 days ago

This is fun and looks amazing, however there seems to be quite a bit of texture in the out of focus blur. There's also a lot of aliasing on the grass. Also, I think the camera shake could do with a very slight delay after the axe hits, and maybe a slightly slower decay curve.

Comment by foxmoss 2 days ago

This is cool, but I just got incredibly sidetracked by the fact that author Gavin Shapiro has a fake museum in the arctic (museumzoetrope.org). Half as a ploy it seems to raise the value of his penguin NFTs, half as quite a little prank on the internet.

Comment by blackdogie 2 days ago

That was a fun work out. I was wondering what happened when you "filled" the circle of firewood.

Comment by ralfd 2 days ago

What happens?

Comment by kevmo314 2 days ago

It starts stacking a second circle

Comment by oytis 2 days ago

Does it ever end though?

Comment by dehugger 1 day ago

Not that I've found, and I am up to my fifth row of wood now.

Comment by cluckindan 2 days ago

No, and that’s what makes it a proper simulator.

Comment by adamddev1 2 days ago

Delightful little experience. Very nice. What would be even cooler would be if the axe only went partway down sometimes and then you have to lift the log up with the axe inside a couple of times to finish it off with that satisfying full split.

Comment by CWuestefeld 2 days ago

If you like this, then try playing Red Dead Redemption 2. While just a tiny part of the game, you improve your relationship with the rest of the gang by doing chores like splitting wood, and also carrying hay to feed the horses.

Comment by mauvehaus 2 days ago

Red Dead Redemption 2? The birding simulator also has firewood splitting and horse feeding simulators?

https://www.audubon.org/magazine/birding-its-1899-inside-blo...

Comment by Tinfoilpigeons 15 hours ago

This is very cool!! Nice idea

Comment by gverrilla 2 days ago

Poms[0] is great. I'd like to be able to upload my dog's pic.

0: https://screen.toys/poms/

Comment by xlii 2 days ago

This is fun. I checked other screen toys by the author, but sadly they aren't as amusing as this one.

The animated gif on the bottom of the list though :D

Comment by RaSoJo 1 day ago

Fun game. But please don't leave it on in the background while moving on to other tasks.

Pretty much killed my venerable i7 mac.

Comment by Waterluvian 2 days ago

I need a fireplace or bonfire simulator that I can throw these into.

Comment by bot403 2 days ago

There's a ton of non-interactive fireplace simulators on Netflix and YouTube. Especially around Christmas.

Comment by t1234s 2 days ago

Wildly addictive.. did Phillip Morris develop this?

Comment by voidmain0001 2 days ago

For everyone referring to splitting with an axe and saying it’s hard, no wonder, everyone in the know uses a maul for splitting, not an axe.

Comment by kwdev 2 days ago

Can I have a "Carry Water Simulator" to go with it?

Comment by NoPicklez 2 days ago

Reminds me of classic mini games on miniclip or addicting games.

I wouldn't call it a simulator but an arcade firewood splitting game

Comment by layer8 1 day ago

Unfortunately the traffic noises don’t make this very relaxing.

Comment by carsonye 1 day ago

Well designed. It has a kind of magic that keeps people hooked.

Comment by PenguineDavid 2 days ago

This is really cool! I honestly spent like 30mins just cutting firewood.

Comment by wxw 2 days ago

Wonderful. I appreciate that it auto-rotates when the piece is too narrow to split along one axis.

Comment by gblargg 2 days ago

That kept annoying me. I thought I was moving the mouse while clicking. I repeated and found it forces a rotate even when you just click.

Comment by ryanisnan 2 days ago

I like how it stacks the firewood.

Comment by greenbit 2 days ago

Right? My inner 17 year old wonders where that magic was, back in the day.

Comment by cratermoon 2 days ago

Fruit ninja but for logs. Now I can finally play lumberjack like I’m Nicole Coenen.

Comment by basedbertram 2 days ago

Fun experience, but the forced rotation after a certain number of cuts diminishes it.

Comment by adm4 2 days ago

great game and very satisfying.

Comment by ETH_start 2 days ago

Quite realistic. Could be more realistic still if you could chop two blocks at once.

Comment by adamzwasserman 1 day ago

It is insane how much I enjoy this

Comment by horticulturist 2 days ago

Oddly fun, though could use a little more variety, maybe with knots, etc.

Comment by supertroop 2 days ago

Thankfully there are no knots and it is softwood. Oddly satisfying.

Comment by alansaber 2 days ago

The momentum on the camera spin is very annoying. Really cool though

Comment by tharkun__ 2 days ago

That and the fact that you can rotate w/ left click as well. Turns out I naturally drag the mouse a little. So having rotate on right click only would be way less annoying, especially when combined with the momentum.

Comment by albumen 2 days ago

But then it wouldn’t work on a touchscreen, and it wouldn’t go viral.

Comment by imagetic 2 days ago

I have never wasted so much time doing something so useless.

Comment by imagetic 2 days ago

It was a lot of fun!

Comment by MBCook 2 days ago

This works amazingly well on my iPhone with obvious touch controls.

Very impressive.

Comment by davidee 2 days ago

Missing the splitting axe getting a little jammed at a knot.

Otherwise excellent.

Comment by beaker52 1 day ago

Where’s carry water simulator?

Comment by boombapoom 1 day ago

where the part where my axe gets stuck and i have to lift up the whole log

Comment by daakni 2 days ago

Feels very satisfying

Comment by thomasfl 2 days ago

Gaussian splat based game will probably become popular. This game is not gaussian splat rendered 3d, but it is pretty close. Next step is gaussian splat and animations.

Comment by felooboolooomba 2 days ago

Bug: No error displayed if WebGL is disabled.

Comment by coolfox 2 days ago

I was able to get 19 slices out of one log

Comment by david422 2 days ago

Didn't even get my maul stuck once.

Comment by vladde 2 days ago

i managed to get 8 pieces standing on the log, without any of them falling off.

Comment by makach 2 days ago

I spent too much time on this.

Comment by alliao 2 days ago

if you click fast enough you summon additional axes from the ether

Comment by kiriberty 2 days ago

But why?

Comment by Aboutplants 2 days ago

Because

Comment by XorNot 1 day ago

Okay so the thing is I want a wood fire simulation too. With as much physics sim on combustion dynamics as possible.

Comment by begemotz 2 days ago

need numbers to go up.

Comment by stevenalowe 7 days ago

Very cool sim!

Comment by kubasienki 2 days ago

Very infuriating, why does it rotate when i want to split it thinner

Comment by NooneAtAll3 2 days ago

webgl :/

Comment by codingconstable 2 days ago

very cool

Comment by KillerRAK 2 days ago

good exercise!

Comment by olalonde 2 days ago

Honestly I'm more fascinated by the grass around, but I haven't played games in a long time.

Comment by MagicMoonlight 2 days ago

[dead]

Comment by __xwd__ 7 days ago

[dead]

Comment by cody_ellingham 2 days ago

Chop wood, carry water.

Comment by mehtablr 2 days ago

Its same as dbdiagram, what's new in this?

Comment by relevant_stats 2 days ago

Comment by traceroute66 2 days ago

Fun but hugely unrealistic simulation, so many "bugs":

    - Able to split log into unrealistically thin slices and they remain perfectly upright
    - Split a log into two, rotate 90 degrees, and by some miracle you can split the half further away from you whilst the piece nearest to you doesn't get hit or move an inch
etc.

Comment by blueaquilae 2 days ago

You don't understand don't you?